Things I’ve Learned from NaNoWriMo
It’s November and NaNoWriMo is in full swing. A co-worker of mine is participating for the first time this year, and chatting with him has given me occasion to reflect on writing, my process, NaNoWriMo, and why I’m not participating this year. To be honest there is a small part of me that wishes I was in amongst the crowd of people furiously pounding away at their keyboards desperately trying to keep their word count up so they don’t fall too far behind. I loved the sense of camaraderie, knowing that you are not alone, and that people are there to cheer you on. In looking back at the two times I did NaNoWriMo I have a few things I can say I learned.
A Rough Draft is Important
I don’t know when or why I decided that I was too good for a rough draft, but it was somewhere during my school years, probably sixth grade which was the first year I can remember actually getting to write short stories for our English classes. One thing that NaNoWriMo helped me see is the value of having a rough draft. Due to the relentless pace most of what I had to write was below my standards, but I needed the word count, so I was happy to prattle on and on about the most stupid stuff, just because it got me closer to my goal. I knew I was going to have to edit it out later, and I would make notes in the margins to that effect. But something happened that I did not expect.
Somewhere along the way my mediocre prose started showing promise. That wasted conversation that I thought was good dialog only insofar as it was extra words, suddenly turned into character development. My story started having a stronger structure to it and a greater sense of depth due to the all the other silly things I was adding in. The dialog was still too verbose, and I still had to remove the kitchen sink during editing (which I’m sure I’ll get to one of these days) but forcing myself to write things I would have normally rejected before writing allowed me to see the promise and potential I would have otherwise prematurely aborted. It’s easier to cut things out of a rough draft than to insert new things.
My Inner Critic is My Enemy (sometimes)
I am a perfectionist’s perfectionist. I wish that were mere boasting. Some years ago I took a personality profile (the DISC Profile) and among other metrics it will ascribe three adjectives and mine were “perfectionist”, “perfectionist”, and “perfectionist” (this compared to another guy taking the test with me only had one of his come up “perfectionist”; lucky guy). Some people have hailed it as a blessing, and I see their point, I on the other hand am intimately familiar with how much it is a curse, especially when it comes to writing.
I have this critical voice inside me analyzing everything I do, say, and think, and that works against any kind of a rough draft process. I’m usually editing while I’m writing, which worked great all through school, because you can do that with essays and research papers; writing fiction is different. Rather than write about what already exists, or make a logical argument for a particular philosophical position, fiction is a work of creation. I spend my professional day writing code, and it too has aspects of creation to it, but the main difference is I have been trained to accept that refactoring code is an acceptable practice. Somehow my inner critic remains silent while I’m writing code, and is satisfied with writing a draft copy and then to iteratively revise it.
I am finding that while my inner critic will motivate me to make sure my writing is the best it can be, there is a time and a place for it, and the rough draft is the wrong time and place. The same holds true for the brainstorming and outlining processes, and I am trying to convince myself that the rough draft is just an extension of that process.
I Need Structure
Despite my need to quell my inner critic I cannot escape the fact that I need structure to my stories. The first time I did NaNoWriMo I had a detailed outline. I had six pages of plot points one after another, in an outline format, each one taking up no more than one line. I never got through the entire outline because there are probably three books in that one outline, however, when it came time to write I knew exactly what I wanted to happen, in what order, and I had a clue as to why. The second time I participated I drew up a looser outline and got stuck after just a few days, and I only wrote 13,000 words. I got stuck and I’m still stuck with the story.
I’m finding that even with the short stories I write that if I do not have a clear picture of how the story unfolds I get stuck in a hurry. I used to think I struggled with the plot and finding good plot points, but now I think it’s more that I’m working against my natural tendencies. When I do any programing I have some kind of an outline document or project specification that I go by, and all the architecture is done there; all the hard questions, all the little details, all the bugs and assumptions are thought through first before I even start programming. It works wonders for me with programming, and I’ve come to accept that I need the same level of detail when it comes to writing fiction.
This doesn’t mean I don’t give myself the freedom to write an impromptu story without much more thought than a brief exchange with a buddy over IM, but it does mean I will be less frustrated with my stories and make better progress if I first know where I intend to go, with whom, why, when, and how. I don’t have to follow the plan exactly, but having one at least gives me something to start with.
Relax and Enjoy
When I am frustrated I can’t be creative. If I am stressed or anxious my creativity cramps up and nothing happens; I’ll fight the story, I’ll fight with the characters, and nothing will feel natural. I’ll only write a few words and end up discouraged. Conversely when I am relaxed I have found that the words flow without effort and I can easily double my word count; not only am I more productive but I’m happier with what I write and I’m less likely to want to attack it with a red pen. I’m still trying to figure out how to pull this off consistently, but more than anything else it’s an attitude. Either I decide to enjoy the process of writing and see where it takes me, or let myself get frustrated and give up.
The reality is bad days happen. They are not a reason to give up, instead I should adjust my expectations of what I’ll get done, and spend more time trying to figure out how to unwind and then re-start. I found that it was important for my momentum to at least do something on the bad days, but it was more important that I let myself have a bad day and then do whatever was necessary to have a better day next time. In the end perseverance paid off, and if I worked at it I could spend more time relaxed while writing then uptight; it is oxymoronic but I have found I do have to work at relaxing, but the creative benefits are tremendous.
Creativity Begets Creativity
I’m still not sure how it works out, but I have noticed that when I engage in a creative process it sparks ideas and inspiration along the same vein and suddenly I have an overabundance of things I’m excited to work on. It has held true when I try my hand at graphic arts, game design, and at writing. If I just get out and write, even if it’s less than mediocre prose, I’ll often get hit with all kinds of inspiration for stories, more than when I just sit and brainstorm for ideas. This is one thing that makes doing NaNoWriMo worthwhile, for if in writing for one month solid I can also fill a notebook with story seeds I will have gained something I could not otherwise possess.
In the years since I have done NaNoWriMo I have not always had an idea that I thought was worth pursuing, and yet during NaNoWriMo I was constantly fighting with myself to stay with the story I was working on and just make notes on the other stories that kept invading my brain. What I learned, and forgot, is that during the dry spells I need to just write, even if it is an exercise or a disposable story; doing so I will often come up with a better idea I will be excited about and then I can work on that. In order to write I must write.
Create a Writing Habit
NaNoWriMo taught me a lot about myself as a writer. More than anything else I think that is the biggest gain from the process. Even if you will never make it to 50,000 words fight through to the end and see how far you get. The best thing you can do is get it done, keep some notes about how it is working out for you, or how it is not, and regroup later to figure out how you write. There is one thing, though, that NaNoWriMo cannot teach me, and this is the main reason why I am not participating this year.
My first attempt was in 2004 and I’ve not yet finished the full rough draft of that story. I hit the 50,000 word goal, but I still have more than half of my outline left. I was so tired of writing that I took a few weeks off, then a few weeks turned into months, and then when I did want to get back to it I forgot where I left off. One day I hope to return to the story and finish the draft, and then edit the beast. The pace NaNoWriMo set is not a reasonable pace for me. Sure I can write more than 2,000 words in a day; I just wrote a 2,300 word short story, on a whim, all in one day, and had it complete before my daughter woke up from her nap. But the main issue is one of time and priorities.
I have a few important responsibilities in my life, and they will always take precedence, and I cannot always make time for a two hour writing session. I need to establish a more long-term writing habit. I still don’t know what that will look like, and I’m toying with things here and there. I doubt writing only one night a week will keep things fresh in my mind, but I know I probably cannot commit to an hour a day. This is the biggest weakness in me as a writer right now. I do not make the time for it, and while I can convince the people around me to cut me some slack for a month while I try to write a novel, I cannot do that every month indefinitely. Once that problem is solved maybe I will once again join the frenzied fray of frantic fiction folks flinging furious fingers for fun.
